Monday, September 05, 2011

Such Sweet Sorrow - Part 1

For an outwardly gregarious person, I don’t make the best partier.

Seriously, partying tends to make me feel contemplative, restless, and incredibly introverted. You know, just the kind of things that you'd look for in a night on the town. I’m talking about all kinds of parties too, not just the BOOM-KA-KA-BOOM club to-dos. If I had a dime for every time I went to a social event in high school, came home and contemplated my life, I would be a rich, rich person.

So, why so serious? I think there’s a few reasons why.

The Set-UP

I took to alcohol later than a lot of people. That sounds awkward. I’m not an alcoholic here! I only mean that I hadn’t really touched the stuff until a few years ago due to a lack of interest (and a serious aversion to fizzy drinks). Furthermore, I didn’t take to partying until around the same time I decided that drinking was fun.

My job. I work with a film festival with a couple of major booze sponsors, so, once a year, I’m able to drink as much as I’d like every night for about a week straight. FOR FREE. Then, when I go out to other festivals . . . same deal. FREE hooch. (unless you count tipping the bartender, which I try to get out of doing if I possibly can)

Do you have any idea how difficult it is to go out and actually have to pay for a drink when you’re used to getting it for free? It’s kinda tough.

And going to a party every night means that there’s 8 days of (mostly) good food, (hopefully) good music, and (usually/maybe) good company. So, for one concentrated period every year, I can drink, dance, eat, hang out, and have a good time. This would be pretty perfect except that I have to stay aware of the next day’s events/screenings/general mayhem and try to be cognizant of the fact that I not only have to be functional then, but want to get home before 2:30 AM.

But most importantly, I really enjoy the chance to talk to people about the things that I think actually matter. So, rather than go out and shake it until dawn, I’d much prefer sitting in the corner with somebody interesting and finding out what makes him/her tick. It’s fascinating.

The Breakdown

Partying, in general, makes that kind of interaction really hard. Instead, it’s all “WHOOOOO!!!!!”, trying to stop thinking about how much you’re actually paying for the drink you think you’ve asked for, and making a half-hearted attempt to groove to a song that you know in the 30 seconds that it’s played before the song changes abruptly to something you’ve never heard before and hopefully will never hear again.

And did I mention that I think over-crowded dance floors are a kind of slow DEATH to a party?

Besides, when you’re the dyad/small group specialist that I am, partying just seems so . . . shallow. It’s that kind of “Why am I here again?” feeling. Sometimes, I don’t even really know the people I’m with. The party atmosphere is deceptive too. It’s so high-energy that you think that all of these cool people you meet are your buddies, which isn’t entirely untrue, but in the cold light of day, they’re not there, you know? Again, if I had the proverbial dime for the folks who’ve said, “oh, Adam, we’ve GOT to hang out when this whole thing is done!” and actually MEANT it . . . I’d be a pretty poor guy. Which I kinda am already. Dangnabit.

I don’t want to seem like I don’t like parties at all. I’ve been to some AWESOME leg-shakers in my day, and it’s not that I want to suddenly see all of my options for going out on a Saturday night dry up.

I suppose that I’d just like to find the balance between the frivolous and the profound.

That sounds easy enough, right?


P.S. I'm going to post something about the new Noel Gallagher single really soon.

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